What's your Porn?

And no, I'm not talking about naked people getting it on. At least not directly.

Once upon a time, I had a roommate who was VERY outdoorsy. We used to go backpacking or rock climbing or camping almost every weekend when we shared an apartment in SoCal. (In fact, he taught me to climb, and has hauled my wussy ass up the rock on many occasions. I owe him big time.)

One day after work, I came home and found him sifting through the mail. Upon uncovering a glossy magazine of some sort, he exclaimed, "Oh cool, it's PORN!"

Immediately interested, I ran over to see what he was drooling over. It was a Patagonia catalog.

If you've never seen the Patagonia catalog, here's the deal. Not only is it filled with photos and descriptions of the many delightful products sold by Patagonia, but also with amazing photos and stories of amazing adventurers having amazing outdoor experiences across the globe. Many of the contributors are famous, at least to the people who are into the climbing or mountaineering or kayaking or whatever community. And everyone in there seems to be leading a life that is just so unfathomably cool. Seriously...how can I work it so I spend my summer bagging peaks in the Himalayas and writing about it for a yuppie/hippie clothing catalog? Sign me up!

So now Patagonia is my Porn too. Every time the Patagonia catalog comes, it's a special day in my house. First, I look at the cover for a while, imagining what might lie beneath. What are they up to, these people who are way cooler than I am? And what kind of breathtaking photos do they have to share? Then, I get comfortably settled and make sure I have an hour to devote to pure pleasure. Slowly I meander through the glossy pages, drinking in every detail and losing myself in fantasies of travel and adventure and wanderlust. What must it be like to wake up to an Andean sunrise at 16,000 feet? How much would I love to be traversing a snowfield and come upon a curious arctic fox? How does Lynn Hill make 5.13 look like such a cakewalk? (And WOW, that Women's Clip Pullover in Aquatic Blue really DOES look like it's keeping her warm and dry while comfortably accommodating her harness. I need one.)

Honestly, I don't even care that the magazine (and Patagonia as a company) are members of the super-extra-green team. In spite of my general repulsion for democrats and modern "liberalism," I'm totally green at heart. I love nature and animals and wide open spaces with no cars or fast food or tourons in RVs. I may disagree with the greenies on the best way to accomplish that, but I wholeheartedly support the goal.

I know lots of girls who have a thing for Wedding Porn. I never really jumped fully on that bandwagon, but I do remember what it was like to positively drool over peoples' wedding pictures and wedding magazines when I was first engaged. Really, it can be any printed or visual medium that you get irrationally excited about and/or savor and pore over in a ridiculous manner. There's Travel Porn (National Geographic Traveler), Sports Porn (ever known someone who had memorized every stat?), Retail Porn (those who stalk Saks.com), Photography Porn (I know some of you are guilty here!), Celebrity Porn (an US Weekly addiction), Nerd Porn (having spasms of excitement over a new issue of the Economist).... The list goes on and on.

Porn of various flavors is all around us. So what's yours?

Anyway, so.....I've got to, um, go into the bedroom for a while with this Patagonia catalog that came today. Knock first if you need me, please. :)